The Waiting Game

I hate waiting. No, scratch that... I loathe waiting. And the fact that I have no control over exactly how long my wait will be... well, that just makes it all the worse. There, I said it.  I'm sure I'm far from being the only person that can't stand to wait.

I've reached my pre-surgery goal weight. Yippee for me! I've actually surpassed the goal by 3 pounds so I've got a little wiggle room for stress! And boy, has there been stress these last few weeks. In addition to the bariatric surgery, I am waiting on shoulder surgery of some kind. The pain at night is insane. I've been dealing with it but there is only so much this moose can take... I'm hoping relief will come soon.

To add to my list of loathings... my periods have been awful since stopping my birth control pill (a prerequisite for the bariatric surgery). Heavy and cramp filled don't accurately describe what's going on. Sooooo, because I am menstal AND anxious AND in pain... I turn to food. Yeah, something I am NOT suppose to be doing. Something I am suppose to be working on since I am clearly "not an emotional eater". Ugh! I'll get through this eventually. I have to dig deep... after I get through this week that is.

Okay... (sigh)
Sorry to have vented and complained.
Sorry for not having updated in awhile too.

The start of something...

So... here I am.  Day 1.  Hopefully day 1 of many. many more to come.  :) From Moose to Mouse is about me. The old me. The fat me. And the transformation that I will be undergoing (crossing my fingers here) shortly.  You see, I am on the road to Bariatric surgery and hope to have my sleeve done next month.  Sooooo, if all goes well, you should be reading (and maybe even seeing) the changes that take place as I go from moose to mouse.  I want this to be an outlet for me to share my journey with anyone that wants to come along.  The road may be bumpy but with me, it'll at least be fun!

Let me go back a bit... this journey has been a rather long one.  I have been heavy, chunky, chubby, plump, squishy my entire existence.  Nope, I take that back, I was a pretty normal newborn.  From there it just went downhill in the weight department.  ;) I was always the fat girl.  I was active but I loved food more than the exercise.  Somehow, I managed to find an awesome guy who loved me for me and still does.  We got married and have 3 children.  Its been a roller coaster ride but needless to say, I got bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller and bigger along the way.  With my oldest child now 9, I knew it was time to really do something.  I mean, I want to be THAT mom.  The one that plays with her kids, goes hiking, gets in the water, runs, skis... yup, that's what I want. So, I started looking into ways to get this weight off once and for all.  

Bariatric surgery is by no means an easy way out.  It is a tool that will give me what I need to get the weight off and keep it off for good. My husband (Mr. O) and I attended our first seminar back in November and I knew sitting there that this was what I wanted.  He was and is behind me 200%. I have had to loose 13 pounds in order for the surgery to even be scheduled and this week is my last weigh in.  I have 1/2 a pound to loose.  UGH... I so hope I did it... it has not been easy.  But thanks to MyFitnessPal and sheer willpower I have pretty much stayed under my 1350 calorie limit. I'll keep you posted  on how that turns out...

I am hoping that I can have the surgery after Easter... I can get through my "last meal" with my family and then jump into this with both feet. Because once its done, I have been warned that the next 3-4 months will be hell. Wonderful, eh? Thankfully, it will be almost summer and school will be out so I can perfect my daily routine before I have to head back to work in the fall.  But man, I can not wait for that first day of school... I'll be like the new kid starting. :) 

So, why From Moose to Mouse you ask? My older brother used to call me (affectionately I'm sure) "fat moose" when I was younger.  Nice, huh? Really, we've moved on from there and have a great relationship so no worries.  But I thought about how visually a moose and mouse are so completely different.  It only seemed perfect that that be what I took as my blog name.  The way I used to eat bs (before surgery) could be likened to a moose (not literally of course) and the way I will eat ps (post surgery) will be a whole lot smaller.  Even the bite size will have to be smaller... the way I will chew my food, the portion size, everything.  But I am ready.  I don't think I have ever been MORE ready.

If anyone has ever had Bariatric surgery or Gastric Sleeve surgery or even just something positive to share, please feel free.